Astro awoke to the sound of some yelling nearby. Standing up and dusting herself off with a stretch, she looked around her environment in the daytime now. This really looked like Socal, scraggly trees and hot sun. A bird was chirping in a nearby tree. Astro walked out to the Quik trip and opened the door to find the source of the commotion that woke her up.
“I’m telling you! They’re wiping their memories, these poor little girls, and making them do despicable things! It’s all real, we need to wake people up to the truth!!!” Screamed an old man, in the process of checking out a pack of jerky. He carried an old wooden cane and stood hunched over it to support his elderly legs. A sliverey metal cooking pot was placed on his head like an 60’s gang baseball cap. The Gen-Z cashier, by contrast, just looked dead inside. “Dave, you need to calm down. There’s nobody stealing girls and wiping their minds. You need to go back home”
The old man sighed and begrudgingly picked up his jerky and started hobbling out the door. The cashier shook his head and muttered under his breath “Crazy old bat” Astro waited for a second, thinking over the conversation she had just heard. This guy’s clearly crazy, but it is very interesting that he described my exact situation… Astro thought about it for a second before following Dave out the door and speaking.
“Hey, I heard you talk about girls with memory loss? Who wiped their memories?” Dave turned around in excitement and spoke up “Why, the lizardman cabal of course! They’re in all the powerful positions. Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, Mark Zuckerburg, the whole lot of them!” Astro stared at Dave, narrowing her eyes suspiciously. “Right, and why did they wipe their memories?” She responded, a bit intrigued. “For loosh of course! You see, loosh is this matter that’s the byproduct of heavy human emotions. You know, like fear and anger and sadness. And the Archons EAT IT FOR NUTRIENTS!!! They farm humans for their loosh production and devour it! You ever wonder why theres so much evil in the world?” Astro thought about it for a second before responding “Well I guess that is pretty internally con-” “-IM NOT DONE TALKING!!!!” Dave screamed, cutting her off. Astro stopped talking, and threw her hands up in surprise.
Dave continued, “There’s a perfectly shaped black hexagon on the planet Saturn. That’s the radio beacon that the Lizardmen use to beam jamming signals into our minds and make us hallucinate! None of this world is actually real! It’s all a radio induced hallucination generated by the Lizardmen to make us feel emotions and generate Loosh! It’s a full soul agricultural machine!” Astro looked at Dave, feigning contemplation. “Radio signals can make you hal-” “I’M STILL NOT DONE YET!!!!!!!!”Interrupted Dave again with a scream. "sorry." Astro said quickly and low, in the same tone that one would say "Sorry, ma’am"
“You know when you die, and you see the tunnel of light? Karma and all that? Don’t go into it! It’s a trap! It essentially signs a contract that lets them reincarnate you into the cycle again! The lizardmen made up the idea of karma to make you feel like you owe something to the universe for your sins, so you go into the tunnel. And you might see your loved ones there too, but don’t be fooled. They’re not your loved ones, they're ARCHONS trying to TRICK you into reincarnating. It makes a contract, that’s what makes this whole system legal!” A silence sat over the air as Dave seemed to finish. Astro finally broke the deafening silence “Dave, are you done y-” “IM NOT FUCKING DONE YET!!!!” Dave screamed for the third time into the empty pump station.
“The lizardmen cabal, they worship the cube on saturn. They call it the Prism. Once you pay attention, you’ll see it EVERYWHERE! Corporate Logos, Statues, Archetecture, all full of cubes!!!” Dave went on. After a final 15 second period of deafening silence, Astro asked “Dave, are you done now?” “Yes” Dave replied in a matter of fact tone. Astro took her opportunity and replied “Ok, Dave. I would love to talk to you more about this but I actually have a dentist appointment to go to, so I need to leave right now” Dave looked understanding and finished “That’s quite alright dear, but take this with you. It’s called Jade, and it will cause your vibrations to rise and make you more open to the truth!” Dave handed Astro a small grey rock like you would find next to an urban planter outside. “Oh, and don’t choose the Raspberry flavor! They put trackers in it”